Tag: family

Categories
Anti-Oppression community connection Equity intersectionality LGBTQ2S+ Newsletters pride understanding bias vulnerabiliity

Unlearning the Nuclear Family

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1685714926487{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]When I was a kid in the 80s, the family sitcom dominated television. From the Huxtables to the Keatons, to the Seavers, it was always Mom, Dad, and 2.5 kids. By then, the nuclear family had become the norm, so usually, both Mom and Dad worked outside the home. 

I always knew I wanted to be a mom someday. Even though my family didn’t look like the ones I saw on TV (I was raised by an Aunt and a Grandma), somehow it never occurred to me that the family I made someday would look different from the ones I saw on TV. I always pictured Daddy, babies, and me.

As I got older and came out as bisexual, my visions of future family life expanded to include the possibility of parenting with a “Daddy” or another “Mommy”, but I was still locked into a really nuclear understanding of what “families” looked like. 

Now my life has taught me a lot better. I do parent my only child with my wife, but welcoming Baby into our family made so much more than three. Our chosen family comprised of friends and partners from our queer and polyamorous communities has always been a huge part of our parenting journey.

We know many beautiful families configured in ways that transcend a couple with kids. We know quartets of a lesbian couple and a gay couple who have chosen to co-parent. We know gay and lesbian besties who have chosen to co-parent with their respective biological and chosen families behind them. We know lesbian couples with a known sperm donor who is deeply involved in their child’s life. There are triads or “thrupples” (a partnership involving 3 adults) who choose to raise families. This could look like a mom having a baby with each of her two male partners, or two women each having a baby with their male partner or any other number of ways of creating a family.

The reality is that Queer and Trans Culture isn’t just about having a life partner who was assigned the same sex as you at birth. Our cultural norms are forged from a history where the most conventional, nuclear way that we could have a family was still socially unacceptable. Many of us and our queer elders were rejected by our biological families for being honest about who we are. As a result, our community has been resourceful and resilient in carving out new ways of defining “family” and building family units that allow us to be whole. We create our own villages that know who we are, where we’ve been, and where we’re going to support us while we child rear and do this thing called life.

5 was a vital turning point for queer and trans families. It made the relationship to the child the focus of parental rights, rather than biology. The law also makes it possible for more than two people to be the legal parents of a child. This legal change was extremely important, but it’s only a fraction of the needed social change.

We must unlearn the idea that “parent+parent+kid(s)=family”. There are infinite equations that can add up to a family. As professional support people, we can embrace the expectation that clients seeking our help could come in ones, twos, or more, reflecting any mix of gender identities. 

We can also expect that folks living outside the parental binary are seeking our support specifically because they can expect that other parts of the health and social service systems don’t expect them, and might be hostile toward anything or anyone that challenges their expectations. We can create an unconditional blanket of compassion and support around all the beautiful shapes and sizes that families come in. That blanket is also a shield against fear and hate that preserves the sacredness of the parenting journey for all people.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][mk_padding_divider][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1686178152124{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]

Keira Grant (she/her) Inclusion and Engagement Lead – Racialized Communities

Keira brings a wealth of experience to the Online Community Moderator role. She is a Queer, Black woman with a twenty-year track record in Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion (EDI) education, projects, and community building initiatives.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

WEBINAR: Fertility & Supporting Diverse Outcomes I September 19 @ 7:30pm EST

No fertility journey is alike! 

Individuals going through a fertility journey will often experience difficult decisions, situations, and roadblocks.

Join us for a 90 minute webinar on Monday September 19th at 7:30pm EST.

Live session, recorded playback, and post-session hand outs!

Workshop Description: 

To best support clients with their unique fertility experiences, this webinar is designed to help Fertility Doulas support their clients in a positive and practical way regardless of outcomes.

Join Jessica Palmquist, Fertility Coordinator and Fertility Instructor for Doula Training Canada, as she discusses options and offers ways to help clients have a useful and productive outlook on the circumstances of their fertility story.

Who can benefit from this webinar?
– Reproductive support persons who are offering fertility support in their community
– Persons interested in joining our Fertility Support Practitioner program 
– Healthcare and other reproductive related professionals who are interested in diversifying their knowledge
– Persons who are experiencing their own fertility journey

Webinar fee:  $20 per participant.  Recorded for playback/ closed captioning available at all DTC webinar events.

Categories
balance birth Business Equity intersectionality Labour Doula LGBTQ2S+ Postpartum Doula pride

Bringing Your Whole Self into the (Birth) Room

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1623409186714{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]It’s June, which means it’s Pride month here in Ontario as well as many other places across Canada and the world. For many of us who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, queer, and/or Two Spirit, (LGBTQ2S) that means an opportunity to celebrate our identities, our relationships, our families, and our whole fabulous selves. But even as we take to the (virtual) streets, we might wonder about bringing our identities into our work with clients.

You might be wondering, “Why do you have to bring your identity into your work? Why can’t you just keep the two things separate?” Bringing your identity into your work doesn’t necessarily mean beginning every introduction with, “Hi, I’m a doula and I’m gay!” (Though it can!) It means being able to use your pronouns, talk about your family, and share stories without having to edit yourself. It means not just seeing your clients, but also being seen by them.

While everybody has different ideas of professionalism, our work as doulas is deeply personal and relational. Sharing between doulas and clients is rarely one sided, and doesn’t have to be. Straight and cisgender doulas share their identities all the time, whether talking about their husbands or posting a family photo on social media, it’s just not seen as coming out because those identities have already been assumed.   

You might also be wondering how moving through the world as an LGBTQ2S doula might impact your business. It’s a real fear: homophobia and transphobia exist everywhere, and there are families who might choose not to hire you because of how you identify or present yourself. There are also families who will hire you exactly because of these things.  

This doesn’t mean that you have to come out: it’s a deeply personal decision. LGBTQ2S doulas navigate their identities in many different ways. You can incorporate your identity into your business mandate and name, and choose to work primarily with LGBTQ2S communities. You can market to a broader audience but share how you identify in your bio or on social media. You can plaster your website with rainbows. You can ask and expect your clients to use your name and pronouns. You can come out in your meet and greet, or as your relationship with a client builds, or when they ask you about your family. You can come out to some clients and not to others. It’s up to you.

Whatever you choose to do, we’re proud of you.

 

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

Categories
balance Business Childbirth Educator collaboration community connection Labour Doula Postpartum Doula Uncategorised

Making Time for Your Business

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1620640152795{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]Making time for your business or schooling while starting out can feel overwhelming. Everyone is given the same 24 hours in a day. Whether you’re a busy parent, full-time student, working two jobs, or generally just living life through these crazy times, how you choose to break up your day or prioritize your schedule can help make or break your business or learning. 

When you are beginning training in birth work it often feels safer to hide behind books and other learning materials instead of taking the plunge to start your side business. It’s always great to educate yourself, and important for your certification; however, sometimes you just have to put the book down and test things out for yourself. Reading or listening to audiobooks can take up a lot of time. They also don’t sink in as well as learning on the go. It’s okay to be afraid of failure, just don’t become paralyzed by the fear. No book will give you the magic business answer you’re looking for. Everything you need to succeed is already in you. Take a leap of faith and go for it. 

 

So how do you start? Here are some time management techniques that may help you get organized. [/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1620639964218{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]The Pomodoro Technique

A time focused technique to help you find time to start a side business is the Pomodoro Technique. This technique requires you to first prioritize your daily tasks. Then, you can set a timer for 25 minutes and take a five minute break between sets. After completing four 25-minute sets you can take a 20 minute break. This allows you to have laser focus on a task for 25 minutes and allowing you to disconnect from your work for a five minute break. This is helpful for those who need to check their phones constantly as it works in time for quick breaks. You can use your phone’s timer or you can search ‘timer’ in Google and a timer will pop up[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][mk_image src=”https://stefanie-techops.wisdmlabs.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/pomodoro-tech.png” image_size=”full”][vc_empty_space][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1620640473548{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]80/20 Rule

The 80/20 rule, also known as the Pareto Principle, suggests that 80% of your results comes from 20% of your output. To find time to start a side business, you need to determine which things are producing the results to focus time on only those things. You can also use this principle to determine which part of your daily routine isn’t producing results for you. For example, if you spend your weekends marathoning shows on Netflix, sleeping in or going out, you may have better results cutting back to make time for your side business.

 

Now for the tips on how to keep going: 

Be aware of Time Wasters

Avoid spending time on things that don’t bring results. Some people spend an entire week designing a logo or crafting the perfect 20-page business plan. However, those tasks don’t generate money for your business. A business plan can start off as a one-pager and be modified along the way. If you lack design skills, you can outsource your logo, or use a tool such as an online logo maker which can be extremely simple to use, and will help you save a lot of time. Or If the task can be modified or changed along the way, there’s no need to overspend time on it. Create a list of priorities such as creating ads, partnering with influencers, producing unique content such as blog posts or social media posts or managing your finances. Then, focus your workload on the top priorities which yield the best results.

 

Set Firm Deadlines

Setting firm deadlines for projects forces you to make time to work on your business. By not allowing yourself to be flexible, you’ll do whatever it takes to make it happen such as waking up earlier or avoiding distractions. What goals do you want to achieve? When do you want to achieve each goal? Write down exact dates. You’ll find that more often than not, you’re able to achieve your goals by the deadline.

 

Don’t Waste Time on Social Media, Maximize It

Without a doubt, social media is a very powerful tool. It reaches out to hundreds upon thousands of people at once. Make sure your business is engaged in social media. This helps you stay relevant. Your content must provide some type of value to your audience. That value could be education, increased productivity, entertainment, or cost savings. It also needs to be in your voice. Share who you are and engage with your audience in an authentic way!

Social media can be addicting. Most of us have the tendency to check our news feed repeatedly throughout the day. You can download a tool like the Chrome extension News Feed Eradicator to help prevent you from getting distracted for hours on Facebook. The tool blocks your news feed without you having to delete or deactivate your Facebook account. If you know social media is slowing down your business’ progress this is a great quick fix solution. Stay focused on your goal, and don’t let yourself get distracted.

 

Learn to Say No

Richard Branson once said, “Business opportunities are like buses, there’s always another one coming.” So while it might be tempting to say yes to every opportunity, saying no often may actually work in your favor. Saying no gives you time to work on things you say yes to. It can help improve your productivity while also creating boundaries. Avoid agreeing to every opportunity or trying every tactic at the same time. Having a laser-like focus can help you achieve your goals faster because you’ll learn how to master things quickly.

 

Hang onto your Enthusiasm

If you ponder over what differentiates an average person from one who has achieved stupendous success, you will realize that it may be the intensity of enthusiasm that has helped the highly successful person reach such great heights. Those who could accomplish great things in their chosen fields could not have done so without enthusiasm.

If you are enthusiastic about a particular goal, you will be so excited that you will do your best in order to achieve it. It will keep you motivated to go on and on with it. This does not mean you will work on it all the time, but even if you are not your mind will constantly be thinking about the goal you are enthusiastic about. It is exactly your subconscious mind that will be focusing on the things you are passionate & enthusiastic about. A lot of research has taken place about the power of the subconscious mind and these researches have revealed that it has enormous powers. When it constantly works on a thing you are enthusiastic about, you will get great ideas and this will fast-track your success.

 

Divide your Time: For Work, Family and Yourself 

Schedule in family time, downtime and work time. When it’s on the calendar, that means you’ve prioritized it and planned for it. Once it’s on the calendar, defend it at all costs. If you have work tasks to do, focus on them distraction-free. If you said you’d stop working at a specific time and relax with family, be sure to stick to that and completely unplug.

That means it’s more likely to happen. For example, if you want to plan a weekly date with your spouse, it’s much better to put it on your calendar set to a specific day and time instead of just saying you’ll get around to it when you can.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1620639940087{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]As much as investing in your business is important, investing in yourself will make the business thrive. 

Success doesn’t happen overnight- it takes time to build a successful business, and there certainly isn’t a secret formula to success. It takes passion, and a lot of determination and resilience, not to mention confidence, and an appetite to take risks. Invest in yourself, schedule and keep your enthusiasm high and you will achieve great things! [/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

Categories
Business Childbirth Educator community connection Health Care holistic nutrition Labour Doula Menopause Postpartum Doula pregnancy rebranding Uncategorised Virtual Webinar

Free Social Media Content Calendar for Birth Professionals – May through August

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1618935599948{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]Here is your birth related social media calendar for May through August! Fill in the blank days with content about you, your business, your services or other special dates.

This is a great place to start when building your social media platform! Need more support? Send us an email and let help you fill your calendar![/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][mk_image src=”https://stefanie-techops.wisdmlabs.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/1.png” image_size=”full”][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][mk_image src=”https://stefanie-techops.wisdmlabs.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/2.png” image_size=”full”][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][mk_image src=”https://stefanie-techops.wisdmlabs.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/3.png” image_size=”full”][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][mk_image src=”https://stefanie-techops.wisdmlabs.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/4.png” image_size=”full”][/vc_column][/vc_row]