Author: Shaunacy

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1588272004469{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]Being a doula or educator in 2020 means being creative!

Amid the changing social times of COVID19 many support persons are finding new ways to connect with clients and hold space for their new experiences in labour, birth, and the postpartum period.

Doula Canada will be updating our members with new resources, hand outs, and templates related to virtual support throughout May 2020.

Check back to this page regularly for new additions and virtual support suggestions![/vc_column_text][mk_padding_divider][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_btn title=”Virtual Support Suggestions: For Doulas” style=”classic” shape=”square” color=”mulled-wine” size=”lg” align=”center” link=”url:%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2020%2F04%2Fvirtual-support-of-doula-clients-2020.pdf||target:%20_blank|”][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]What is the secret to longitivtiy as a professional support person?

Is it business savvy, resiliency, or luck?  Perhaps it is a bit of each, and then some.

Lately our Director at Doula Canada has been meditating on what it means to be a doula with tenure; what it takes to not only make birth work a life-long career, but what is also means to be championed through the eyes of ones clients.

The secret?

Read on.[/vc_column_text][mk_padding_divider][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1572910346032{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]Today I would like to explore the importance of equanimity and strengthening ourselves through the experience of learning to sit amidst discomfort.

As birth workers we are called by our clients to support them through their own needs, and sometimes that can create discomfort in our own bias, philosophies, and called upon memories.

We bear witness to some of the most miraculous experiences of life, but many a doula can speak to unexpected situations that have triggered their fears and lessened their professional resolve.  Sometimes the miraculous can turn into worrisome, and our exposure to emotions, pain, and anxiety can rock our psychological stability.

Equanimity, the ability to remain psychologically composed through all types of experience, has become synonymous with the word “doula” in my career of supporting families.

Actual synonyms for the word “equanimity” are peace, calm, composure and poise, and at DTC our team often speaks to the importance of these practices not only in the support of our clients, but for our lives in general.  For we have long learned as doulas that in the face of adversity, equanimity can lead to leadership, positive outcome, and balance.

Mature equanimity brings a radiance and a confidence.  It allows our clients to see the warmth of our being, even in the most unexpected of experiences.  It is the ability to see without being caught up in what we see, and to observe from a place of holistic support unmarred by our own prejudice or bias.

Learning to embrace equanimity and to sit within discomfort also allows us to see the entire picture.  It ensures that as doulas we can use our understanding and emulate patience in an environment full of high running emotions.  It removes our impulse to be reactionary and always have “the answer,” when sometimes it is the pause between the words that holds the power of what we can suggest.

Equanimity can often be promised through the wisdom of time, and the power of experiencing uncomfortable situations.  However, as a new doula it is important to remember that equanimity is not harnessed solely by years of experience. It can also be called upon through the understanding that people are responsible for making their own decisions and that as a birth worker we are not solely responsible for their well-being.

Take a moment to think about how you practice equanimity in your daily life.

There’s a beautiful poem about deepening our resilience to discomfort and challenge, it reads:

“Where would I find enough leather to cover the entire surface of the earth?

But with leather soles beneath my feet, it’s as if the whole world has been covered.

Likewise, it’s not possible for me to restrain the external course of things,

but should I restrain this mind of mine, what would be the need to restrain all else?”

We don’t have control over all else but do have control over our self.

We don’t need to cover the world with leather, instead, we toughen the leather on our own feet so that we are more resistant to it.

-Shantideva, 8th Century Indian Buddhist Monk

The message of this poem is that we often don’t have control over what happens in life, but we do have control over our response.  We can become more resistant to discomfort but embracing peace, calm, and composure.  And we can become a championed doula in the eyes of others by remaining equanimous.  We can learn to sit in discomfort and observe the space between uncertainty and knowing.  We can do(ula) our best in those moments.

How do you practice equanimity in your daily life?

What moments of discomfort stand out to you as times when you practice composure and calm?[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

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As we approach the Thanksgiving season, I’m finding more quiet moments to reflect on all the ways in which I’m grateful. I’m thankful for my growing family, our health, our friends, and all of the people who have had a positive impact on me since starting my fertility doula business and journey with Doula Canada.

It was just this year that I decided to pursue a career as a fertility doula and enrolled in the March 2019 self-study Fertility Support Practitioner training with Doula Canada. I am grateful for the online webinars in which my classmates and I chatted about our own experiences with our personal fertility and what we learned from working with clients. I am grateful for the wealth of knowledge and experience provided by our instructor, Caylan Barber, and her unwavering support when we needed it.

It’s been a short seven months since starting my business and not surprisingly, it’s a slow process making my way through this line of work. It’s easy to forget sometimes that part of being a doula is also being an entrepreneur and a business owner. I’m grateful for all the people who have pointed me in the right direction, answered my questions, and who genuinely want to see me succeed in supporting menstruators everywhere. This process has opened my eyes to the possibilities of how I can reach more people and also continue to stay home with my children.

I, of course, could not make this dream a reality without the support of my family and my husband, who may not always understand everything that I do, but understands that this is something that fills my cup and thereby makes me a better Mom and better human being.

Lastly, I love being a doula for many reasons, but being of service to others has opened me up in ways that I never thought possible (I love me a good spiritual transformation!). Learning to make and hold space for others as they move through their own journeys toward truth, letting go of ego as well as what is “right” or what “should be” and instead being present to embrace what is. It’s the most challenging yet most rewarding aspect of this calling and I am eternally grateful and humbled for the way it has changed me.

[/vc_column_text][mk_padding_divider][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column width=”1/2″][vc_single_image image=”146678″ img_size=”full”][/vc_column][vc_column width=”1/2″][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1569859911235{margin-bottom: 0px !important;}”]About Stefanie:

Stefanie Blackman Fertility is a service-based business that focuses on fertility awareness, menstrual cycle education, preconception and reproductive health, trying-to-conceive support, and specializing in cycle charting using the Symptothermal Method of fertility awareness. The period of preconception is often not given adequate consideration but is a crucial part of the trying-to-conceive journey. As I always like to say, “plan for pregnancy like you would for your wedding.” While I’m passionate about this part of my fertility doula work, my goal with all of my clients is to unveil the power they have always possessed by using fertility awareness to reconnect to their cyclical nature, to embrace and honour menstruation as a sign of health rather than a monthly nuisance, and to make empowered, informed choices based on their reproductive goals.

Starting at the age of sixteen and through my own diverse experiences with hormonal birth control, conceiving two children, and experiencing miscarriage, I have learned just how important the role of the menstrual cycle is in our overall health, and how it can be used as a fifth vital sign for all menstruators. I have a newfound appreciation and love for my menstrual cycle. I embrace and honour my cyclical nature, and I bring this holistic perspective into my work as a fertility doula when educating others on their own fertility and reproductive health.

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